


Thorn In My Side

by Wealthywetsunny



Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: Anger, Angst, F/M, Fluff, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-11
Updated: 2018-08-11
Packaged: 2019-06-25 19:57:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15647892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wealthywetsunny/pseuds/Wealthywetsunny
Summary: After destroying the large ‘YES’ sign, the deputy had laughed when John threatened to make her build what she broke and bury her underneath it.Yeah right. She’d kill him before that ever came true.She joked and toyed around with her friends until John yanked her from her very peaceful sleep with absolutely no warning and forcing her hand to rebuild it in all its beauty. If only he would be a little easier to work with and wouldn’t micro manage every small thing.





	Thorn In My Side

The sign was a complete fucking mess. Shambles of metal that hung precariously over the mountain that threatened to drop on their heads at the slightest breeze. The white pieces that spelt out the word ‘YES’ was ruined. Tiny shards that couldn’t possibly be used for this new sign John insisted on building. No rhyme or reason to why it had to be right now, just some day in the middle of October at dawn. Fucking dawn. She wasn’t even aware John was awake at that time. But here he stood next to her, arms crossed and a look of utter contempt and vehemence painting his beautiful features. 

“Be glad that I found it in me to pay you for your services Deputy.” She simply rolled her eyes. No doubt was Joseph the one who insisted she get something in return for this forced manual labor. Greed never made anyone look good. “ I expect the best results, top performance. What I give you at the end of the day as my way of saying ‘thank you’ depends on how serious you take this. Keep that in mind if you think of making a mockery of this masterpiece. This isn’t a joke and you’ll have regrets if you don’t follow through with my plans.”

She snorted, eyes scanning over the wreckage that was entirely her fault, she wasn’t going to deny that. She was damn proud of what she did. The Rye’s plane was hard to miss with its brightly yellow paint reflecting off the sun and letting all know of her presence if you glanced in the direction of his abomination of a sign. She was bursting with joy when John threatened her over the radio. Anytime she made him that mad was a win in her book. Easy to do sure, but never before had he taunted death over her head. The deputy didn’t think he’d act so fast when not even a week later she was yanked to this location. 

“You’re men aren’t builders, they don’t look competent enough beyond killing. I don’t see any equipment or supplies either, no blueprints. What do you want me to do John?” Her words were laced with a sardonic tone that had his lips tighten into a thin white line.

“These men are the same ones who helped me with Deputy Hudson’s commercial.”

“That’s not a good thing John. I wasn’t too impressed.” 

“I was. I liked it. So they are here today to...oversee this little project.” John gritted the words out as if they pained him. He took a step forward, grabbing her shoulders and frowning. “You will get this done Deputy.”

“With. What.” Her eyes met his in a challenge. “I need supplies. Perhaps a chance to draw out some idea for this stupid bullshit.”

“Hm.” John suddenly took a step back, hand coming up to rub at his face. “I see. That would help huh...” His lips pursed, she could see the cogs turning in his mind. 

“I’ll be taking my leave.” The Deputy quipped before turning on her heel and waving off John’s angry words. She glanced over her shoulder, brandishing her sleek radio. “I’ll be in touch.” 

Escaping John Seed was impossible no matter where she was or what she was doing. She began to question his sleep cycle and how busy he kept during the day with how frequently he contacted her. Daily calls asking how everything was coming along or if she needed help. Going as far as to proposition to bring her over to his ranch to talk it over. 

Yeah. She’d pass. She would also ignore her friends inane ramblings about how much he wanted her, that she should have pity on him and just have lunch with the man. 

A week later and she was close to pulling her hair out. She was in the middle of taking a shower. Something very sacred considering all the running around she did. Dutch was kind enough to offer up his space whenever she needed it. It was later than she’d normally prefer to clean up, almost 1 pm. Her hands were tangled in her hair, scratching roughly to work out the dirt and knots when her radio blared to life. 

The sound made her flinch. Her foot slipped on the floor from the suds that had gathered at her feet and she went down hard. Her elbow slammed on the wall and she ended up on her back, legs on dangling over the lip of the porcelain tub. The water was in her eyes, she tasted soap on her tongue. To say the least, she wasn’t pleased. 

She came up quickly, sputtering and wiping her   
eyes. The curtain was pulled back so she could peak out her head and fumble around to grab her radio. She held it out far so water wouldn’t ruin it, she definitely didn’t have the money to buy a new one. 

“What.” Curt. Short. Straight to the point. This better be important. Her hands were already turning off the water, ready to run to someone’s distress call. 

“My, my Deputy. No need to sound so upset.”

“John I swear to God you better be dying or some shit. What do you need?”

There was a long pause. Long enough for her to place the radio down and step out of the shower to wrap a towel around herself. “Hypothetically, if I were dying, would you come help me dep?”

“Not in the mood for games, do you actually—“

“My ranch, now, if it’s not too much trouble.” The radio clicked lightly, signaling his end to this conversation. He left her mind reeling with the kind way he asked her to come over. It almost sounded like he was giving her the option to decline. But below that she knew that he held all the cards. That he was being civil out of some kindness left in his cold, withered heart. At the flick of a wrist he’d send a capture party out for her. With that in mind and her hair still dripping wet she yanked on clothes and told Dutch if he didn’t hear from her in an hour to send everyone. 

The ranch was devoid of any Peggies. That alone set off alarm bells in her head. He wasn’t kidding was he? His family would hunt her down and rip her to shreds if he died and she knew about it.

The front door was unlocked, she thanked God for that one. No way did she feel like climbing through a window. 

Her pistol was held in a death grip as she cleared the ground level of his house. The lights were all off and everything was silent. She bounded up the steps, feet moving lightly across the wood. She hesitated at a set of large double doors. A sliver of soft yellow light was peeking out from below. With a count of three in her head she pushed the doors open, gun raised. 

John stood, eyes blown wide and the hint of a smile appearing on his face. 

Her hands were shaking from anger. He didn’t look scared or injured. In fact he looked happy. 

“Deputy.” John’s booming voice made her wince. His arms were thrown wide and he laughed. “You came.” He whispered it, seeming awestruck. 

“I came because you said you needed help.” Her gun was still pointed at his head. God she could shoot him dead right now and no one would no hear about it until morning. That should be enough time to run into hiding. 

“No. No I never said that. It was a hypothetical situation.” He chuckled, “Are you going to shoot me after you’ve come all this way to be my protector?” 

She took a deep breath, slotting the pistol in her hostler. He visibly calmed down, the tension in him left, making his shoulders drop. His smile grew wider and he dared to walk closer. “Good choice.”

“Why’d you ask me to come here? I was in the middle of showering.”

“Oh.” He sounded genuinely upset that he interrupted her. “I, I had a question.” Mumbled meekly as he held her gaze. 

“A question? A question that needed my immediate attention and me being here, physically in front of you.” 

“Yes.”

That’s how she ended up lounging on John’s bed, tea in hand, a show of hospitality to make her stay. A blanket was rounded up over her shoulders as he brandished the different shirts he owned. He held them against his naked chest, looking for her opinion. He was insufferable and so extra. No one else would drag her out to their house to ask which shirts he should keep and which he should toss. This routine of him throwing out half his wardrobe was hidden behind the guise of not wanting to be greedy or vain. She could see right through him, how he lit up when she came around. So instead of asking for her company he dragged her out here making her think he was in trouble. To be fair when he asked previously she did say no. 

When she left it was close to 4pm. Three hours spent with this man acting like she was his wife or a loving friend. 

She left bleary eyed, declining John’s offer for her to stay a little longer so she could sleep. A quick reminder given that she had his sign to work on. 

Eventually she did gather all she needed. With endless pestering to her friends or people she’s helped in the past saying how they owed her. It was a low blow, guilt tripping someone into helping her. It worked though. She had something that would mirror what the old ‘Yes’ sign looked like. White paneling and a new iron frame to hold it up. It would get the job done. She had even gotten John to cave and supply all the heavy machines she would need to build it. 

She appeared with John’s men to work in the early morning light. At first they stood back and watched her struggle. The thing was huge, it’d take forever. And the constant complaints coming from the Peggies wasn’t helping either. They had to watch her while she worked according to John, so long as she was here, they had to stay too. 

When it was finished she had to say she was proud of her work, something she wouldn't admit to John for obvious reasons. She sat on the grass, far enough so she could admire her work and wait for John to arrive. When he did, he came in his personal plane, the Affirmation. She hopped onto her feet, arms crossed over her chest and smile glinting wide. He came around, scanning her work and stood next to her. 

“Hm.” 

“It’s done, doesn't look half bad huh?” She nudged his side. 

“I mean, yeah, there's nothing wrong with it. It's alright.” He walked forward, ignoring her furious stance. Was he pulling her leg? “But is it really me? Does it truly exude The Power of Yes?” He spread his arms and tipped his head up to the sky. 

“You gotta be kidding me.” She snapped at him. Walking closer and shoving a finger in his face.”This looks exactly the same as the last one.”

“Yes, I've noticed. And that's the problem. I've been talking about this for a while, people are expecting big things from me.” 

“But you said when I destroyed this that I had to rebuild it. So I rebuilt it. Beggars can't be choosers.”

“I know what I said. But seeing it now.” He took a few steps back, as if to get the bigger picture. A low noise of disgust came from his lips. “No..no this isn’t right.” John sighed, hand coming up to rest over his heart. “It needs to pop. To make people gasp in awe over how magnificent it is. How are people going to understand The Power of Yes if the sign doesn’t compare to all their hopes and dreams?” He turned suddenly, eyes on her like he wanted an answer. 

“This took so long to do. I pissed off a lot of people to gather all those materials.”

“Hmph. Well that’s nothing new, so I’m sure you can do it again.”

She scrubbed a hand over her face. “What should I change it to?”

“Surprise me.” Her mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water. She barely knew John outside of all the rumors the locals told her, and those were extremely biased after what the Baptist had done to everyone. Now she was supposed to guess how he wanted his sign to look like. She’d be here for weeks when she should’ve been up in the mountains by now. She’s never met Jacob but right now he seemed like a better option this his extravagant brother. 

It was like doing the walk of shame later than night when she curled up in her sleeping bad under the stars and set her radio channel to Joseph’s. 

“I’m sure you know that John wants his sign rebuilt.” Her arms were behind her head, teeth clenched and hoping he was awake.

There was a soft laugh that made her curse this family. “He has mentioned it quite a few times. He’s excited. You don’t know how much it means to him, to us too. It’s nice to see our brother so lively.”

“Yeah, uh huh, that’s great Joseph.” She rubbed her eyes. This was already tiring. She didn’t need a guilt trip from him, she was hoping he’d be rude, not thank her. That’d be easier to deal with. “He’s leaving me in the dark here. I wanna make something he’ll like. So...what does he like? Help me out.”

“Oh.” He sounded too defeated considering the question she asked. “John has always been creative. He likes showy, flashy things Deputy. Bright and bold. I think that reflects his personality well.” Joseph hummed.

He wasn’t telling her anything she didn’t know, just confirming her thoughts. To be fair it was late, almost midnight. And he did sound tired. She didn’t need his family getting on her case for keeping their precious Father awake. 

Four hours later and having some sort of list with what she needed and she went to calling Jacob. “Hey, uh—“ she winced at the way her voice cracked. She’s never seen him outside of that first encounter at the church, but she’s heard plenty. And it didn’t seem like it’d be a good idea to bother him so early in the morning. 

“Dep. What a pleasure. You finally coming to visit? Gonna try to take me out like my sister?” Her body instinctively tensed. His voice was gruff and edgy. It sent shivers down her spine. It wasn’t friendly or cocky like his brothers. “Um, no. No Jacob.” She cleared her throat. “I need help.”

“Course pup. After all the shit you’ve caused I’d be glad to help.” 

“For fuck’s sake,” she slammed her fist down on the ground. “Stop with the fucking sarcasm. I need help with your brother. John and his stupid sign. I’m close to pulling my goddamn hair out.” 

“Hey, calm down dep. Sound like you’re heading for a breakdown.” Any other time and she would’ve went off on him, but even to her own ears she could hear that she was close to crying. “It’s hard to please John, honestly. Most times he doesn’t know what he wants until he sees it. it’s all in how you sell it.”

“Make him think it’s good, convince him it looks nice.”

“Yeah, go all out pup. If it’s extra and fancy then that’s John.”

“Mkay.” She mumbled around the pencil eraser she had been chewing on. Anxiety wasn’t fun. 

“That help? We okay now?” His voice had lowered, calming and soothing. This was what people said about him, that he manipulated others. Right now she couldn’t see what all the fuss was about. She didn’t mind this. “Now go finish up making that sign for John so you can get your ass down here and we can meet each other. John talks a lot about you. I’m excited, see ya soon.” The radio clicked off, leaving her alone with her thoughts. 

Despite their helpful tips about John, his family proved useless when she asked for any materials to make this process go faster. Probably because they found John’s updates funny, since according to Joseph, he talked about this ordeal way too much. 

This meant it took twice as long with double the radio calls from the Baptist. She was thinking about leaving her radio at Dutch’s bunker. 

Finally, after weeks of preparing she had it all figured out. She made a call to John to let him know it was happening, to send his men to the building sight. There was an excitement in his voice that she’s never heard before. One that wasn't laced with a sadistic purpose. Just pure, innocent joy. He even offered to let one of his men stop at her place to pick her up. And who was she to refuse?

The whole project didn't take one day. If this was going to be done right then she wasn't taking any shortcuts. 

Her working on the sign didn’t stop John from calling her daily. Always asking for updates and questions. Wanting for reports or clues on what it would look like.

“You know John, the longer you keep talking to me the longer it will take for this to be finished.”

She heard his exasperated gasp that caused her to chuckle. Her hands got caught in a tangle of wires and power cords. “John, just let me do what I do best.”

“Cause pain and destruction wherever you go? Should I be worried about what you’re doing Deputy?”

She chucked the radio on the grass and got back to work, telling one of the Peggies to go airborne to make sure John didn't get anywhere close to his sign. God knows it was twice as large as before. This time around it should match up to his ego. A small jab that he would never know about that her friends would gladly enjoy.

The sun was just beginning to dip below the mountains, the lasts flickers of sunlight were gone. The sky was devoid of bright oranges and pinks and was a deep navy blue. The sign was finished and in no way was she going to come back out here in the morning. She was already about to collapse. She cupped her hands around her mouth to yell, “Call John, tell him to get his ass over here!”

It took an alarmingly short amount of time for John to show up. He came racing through the air, almost slamming into her when he landed. 

She jogged up to his plane, hand held out to help him down when he almost face planted from moving too fast. “It’s really done?” His grip on her hand tightened as he pulled her towards it. 

“No John, I called you out here for fun.” Her sarcasm seemed to bounce right off him judging by the large smile he still held. “Its big.” He stopped, frowning. 

Fuck. God, no, she couldn't handle the stress of doing this again. She wouldn’t. Especially not to change the size. 

“Maybe a fly by would be better?” John said, slinging an arm around her. 

“Yes, that’d work.” She said the word just for him, hoping that after this she would never be in his debt again. 

They took to the air, John strapping on a parachute and shrugging when he caught the look she was giving him. “Just in case the plane goes down.” She snorted, realizing that he never offered one to her. Then again, her wingsuit should be enough, provided the trees below weren’t too thick. 

The sign was breathtaking, she heard John gasp. It made her smile and lean forward to place her hand on his shoulder. The paneling of the sign was a type of reflecting silver that made it shine from the way the sun would reflect off of it. In the night the lights around it made the word stand out, a bright blue that faded into an ombre effect. It practically lit up the whole mountain top. She bet it was just like The Father statue Faith made, no matter where you were in Hope County you’d be able to see it.

“So…” Her words hung in the air as he flew by a third time.

“You've done me justice Deputy.’

“We done here John?”

“We are.” He glanced back at her with a soft smile. “Suppose you want your payment.”

“Mhm, i've got something in mind too.”

“Oh yeah? Go for it. Maybe I'll say yes. I'm in a good mood now.” And he wasn't joking either, she could here the joy in his voice. The glee that would last for weeks. 

With careful, nimble hands she unstrapped him from his seatbelt. The glass cage locking them in was snapped open. “Dep--” He didn't get the chance to finish whatever threat he was about to say. She shoved him out, once again moving quickly to change seats and snap the enclosure shut to keep her inside. She circled the area once to make sure the sudden surprise didn't cause him to plummet to his death. Lucky for them both he was heading towards an open stretch of road, clutching tight to the parachute. 

“Deputy.” She jumped, hand falling to her radio. John was the only man who so soon after being tossed into open air would contact her as he was still falling. “What was that for? Why did you kick me off my own plane?”

“She’s my gift.”

“If you think you are taking Affirmation from me then you are sorely mistaken.”

“It’s mine now John, might ask Rye to paint over it. Give me some lessons too. Heard he’s the best pilot in Hope County.”

Over the static there was his startled intake of breath. Maybe that was too far. 

“That man,” He seethed, “He is a phoney and a liar and a...a,” John muttered a slew of curses that caused her to laugh. 

“Have fun walking home Johnny!”


End file.
